Swayze Recounts Lowest Days in Memoir

By PopEater Staff Posted Sep 30th 2009 04:00PM

Patrick Swayze's intense battles with alcohol and depression nearly cost him his marriage earlier this decade, the late actor reveals for the first time in his book 'The Time of My Life,' released Tuesday.

His struggle with drink had long been a strain on his wife of 34 years, Lisa Niemi. In the book, he recounts a 10-year period spent drinking "copious amounts of alcohol" and later a 1993 incident where he kept passing out while shooting 'Father Hood.' Through it all, he and Lisa butted heads.

Around ten years later, Swayze, saddled with doubt about his career, sank into a deep depression. "I started drinking again," he writes.

"I found levels of bottom that I didn't even know existed, but, for Lisa, this was too much. She packed up a couple of suitcases and took off one morning before I woke up."

According to EW, Niemi moved to an apartment 20 minutes away from their ranch and stayed there a full year. They spoke every day, but didn't officially reunite until 2004, while he was filming 'King Solomon's Mines.' Still, it wasn't until three years later after they consulted a psychic (for his birthday) that they fully reignited their love for each other.

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Patrick & Lisa: A Love Story

A 19-year-old Swayze met Lisa Niemi in 1970 at his mother's dance studio and she immediately brought the cocky hunk and his ego down to earth. "She didn't buy any of my nonsense," he's said of their early days. "We spent half our dates in total silence as she wouldn't talk to me if she thought I was putting on an act." Five years later they were married. MORE PICS >>

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Patrick and Lisa: A Love Story

Getty Images

In 1978, he landed the leading role in 'Grease' and five years later was cast by Francis Ford Coppola in 'The Outsiders.' During that time period, when he wasn't getting many meaty roles, his wife was his rock. "I'd be dead without her," Swayze told PEOPLE in 1984. "She helped me break my self-destructive tendencies. I was an insecure little baby. I don't ever see us apart." Pictured, the pair at the 1979 premiere of 'Skatetown USA.'

Frank Edwards, Getty Images

On a few occasions they were able to work together onscreen, including in the 1987 action film 'Steel Dawn.' "She's my creative partner," he said.

Everett Collection

Even Swayze's costars in some of his biggest films took notice of the strength of their marriage. "They're like a single organism," Kelly Lynch, Swayze's costar in 1989's 'Road House,' told PEOPLE. "She is a strong, strong woman – very funny, very kind, very smart. They love each other and it's apparent. The partnership is for life."

Frazer Harrison, Getty Images

Their ups and downs included bouts with alcoholism and a devastating miscarriage on Valentine's Day in 1990 that dashed their hopes of ever having children. "We just missed our window; we got so focused on our world and our careers that we missed the boat," he told PEOPLE in 2007.

Ethan Miller, Getty Images

Swayze looked great dancing with Jennifer Grey in 'Dirty Dancing,' but he first practiced all the moves with Niemi. She also inspired him to write the hit track, 'She's Like the Wind.'

Artisan Entertainment / Everett Collection

Swayze's final on-screen performances were in the A&E show, 'The Beast,' when he was in the midst of chemotherapy. Through it all, Niemi was always on the set and even directed an episode. She said: "He was fantastic. He had challenges because he was still doing chemo and it wasn't always easy, but he'd suit up and show up. He was always there ... He treated me like he was honored to show up on my set."

AP / FilmMagic

"A relationship survives because of keeping the friendship alive and learning how to fall in love over and over again and never taking the other person for granted and seeing things in a new light with new eyes," Patrick said in 2007. "We're big believers in, arguments are okay as long as it's not about your ego, but it's about a mutual goal -- trying to create something special."

Bauer-Griffin

"We've always been a team. We raise horses together, run a music business and a wildlife preserve together," Patrick once said of Lisa, both seen in 1979. "We have an unspoken language after all these years."

Getty Images

"The way he looked at her, the way he held on to her, the way she smiled, I can't really imagine one without the other," Barbara Walters said about spending time with the couple in December 2008 on their California ranch for the TV special Patrick Swayze: The Truth. "That marriage is extraordinary."

Ron Tom, ABC / AP

A few months later, in January 2008, the 'Dirty Dancing' star was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.

In the audiotapes for the book, Swayze himself describes the moment he received the diagnosis. [Hear a snippet at Access Hollywood.]

"When my doctors at Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles said the words 'pancreatic cancer', a single thought popped into my head: 'I'm a dead man.'"

He continues: "Now, a lot of things go through your head when you get a death sentence handed to you, starting with, 'Why me?' It's hard not to sink into bitterness. For me, that initial shock quickly turned into self-criticism and blame."

Also in the book, Swayze reveals that his mom actually found out he had cancer from a National Enquirer reporter. He decided to keep the news from her because she had just received eye surgery and doctors warned her not to cry.

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Remembering Patrick Swayze

Patrick Swayze died Sept. 14 at the age of 57 after a nearly two-year battle with pancreatic cancer. Look back at the highlights of the beloved star's life >>>

Getty Images / Lionsgate Home Entertainment / AP / Paramount / Everett Collection

Stephen Lovekin, WireImage

Tags: lisa niemi, LisaNiemi, patrick swayze, PatrickSwayze, the time of my life, TheTimeOfMyLife

Comments

(129)

Wednesday 30 September

By ID

Highest Rank Vote down Vote up Report this

You truely are a stupid human. How can you blame "Wiggling around" for causing cancer. I would never wish the pain and heart break of cancer on anyone, not even an idiot like you, but you should think about what you say before you say it. You disgust me. And your a disgrace to the human race.

By regina

High Rank Vote down Vote up Report this

God Bless you Patrick. My own father died this year after only knowing he had this cancer for a couple of weeks. He will be the one singing in the choir!

He was not a drinker or smoker and was only a bit older than Patrick. Don't judge!!!!

By CeCe

You're right, David. My aunt died of pancreatic cancer and had never smoked or drank. I had a friend who died of lung cancer who had never smoked and lived in a free household. As for Tom, you probably can't 'wiggle around' or you would. What an idiot.

By Frank

Tom, I am going to say something to you. Remember one thing that I am saying. If you look in the mirror, you will see the stupidist, most moronic person you have now or will ever see. Your remarks border on someone who has the IQ of an imbecile. I feel sorry for you. All of what I said above is true unless you were kidding. Have a nice day!

By muffinfluffer

TOM - you are an ass. And a hole.

Can I get an AMEN?

By Suzy

Vote down Vote up Report this

Diane, wtg! That must have been a tough challenge. I may be wrong, but it appears from your post that you're probably in remission. (Correct me if I am wrong) Anyway, cancer has touched my family too many times and has affected my husband's family, soon after we moved in together, but before we were
married on 3/17/07. A long time ago, my brother who
is now 55, had testicular cancer when he was 19. He
lost one of his testicles and it lay dormant until about 3 months later the cancer cells attacked his lymph nodes throughout his chest and lower back area. He's now in remission as that was over 30 yrs
ago. My father had cancer 3 times and of course the
3rd time did him in. The 1st was kidney cancer, actually discovered totally by accident, during a chest xray, the Radiologist was able to see the top
half of the kidneys. The Dr. found a tumor, encased in his kidneys. He had the cancerous kidney
removed and he healed. That was 1994. In 2004, my
dad told me that the dr found a skin cancer on him,
which was the worst case possible. He was dealing with Melanoma, stage IV skin cancer. He had some moles and strange growths removed off his back. My husband's brother was going through a terrible divorce and he committed suicide on 12/07/94. My husband's other brother (years later), developed throat cancer and passed away at age 43 in 2005. My
dad got cancer one more time. It was actually a
form of the skin cancer that was so bad. My dad passed on July 2, 2007. I forgot another person. My
son's father passed away from esophagul cancer in,
2006 the day after my son's b'day. Figures. It was,
however, my b'day. Leave it to the ex to exit on the day you were born! j/k. But there's a lot of
people out here whom have lost a lot, like me. I know I'm not alone b/c everyone has lost someone in
their life, at one point. God bless all. Peace out.

By Roy

Even after reading the article, a self held evaluation of common bond still holds an impression of why Patric and Lisa, had a shared bond. That bond was one of adventure and getting involved with the drama of being there; Wherever the occasion is decided upon. The greatest thrill, is an input without a put down. Adventure, of any kind, was a shared experience, with a trusted partner. Nothing bad should be spoken, only the shared life is more highly valued.

By neice

thats really sorry to say as respectful as i can stupit

By countme

Good Grief! What tree did good old Tom fall out of?? Can you imagine "how" he dances folks??

By karen

Hey Tom...I'm sure the only thing you can wiggle is your lying ass out of a tight situation....moron. Typical white right handed hetero who can't dance and is an idiot

By Roxanna

It was a JOKE - he doesn't really think that wiggling around causes cancer!

By Wayne

I have to laugh at what some consider a 'bombshell'. Now if he was a closet gay and had a male lover on the side or something like that, that would be a bombshell.

By Lisa

My father died of pancreatic cancer in 1982. He was treated at the National Institute of Health, and we were told by them, even back then, that pancreatic cancer is most common in middle-aged men who have been heavy drinkers and smokers. My father was both. (Of course the occasional little old church lady gets it, too, but MOST often, it's the drinking/smoking men.) This whole thing with Patrick Swayze has been strange for me. I find myself being angry at a perfect stranger for being so careless with his life and leaving those who love him behind. I think I have issues that I didn't even realize before now. People--look beyond your "self" and please think about what you might be doing to your kids!

Duh! lol. I forgot to mention the cancer patient, associated with my husband's brother who committed suicide in 1994, probably due to a bad marriage. But I forgot to mention another possible reason on why he committed such a self-hating crime. His soon
to be ex-mother-in-law was laying in the hospital, dying of colon cancer. So, I didn't mean to sound
'blonde' (even though I really am! lol) by just arbritarily adding a death, which has no connection with cancer, the main topic! ~ Peace out..

By Terry

LOOKING FOR DIRT ALREADY!!

By Lori

Lisa knows the comments made on a site about her husband that allows such words isn't worth reading. This is the first and last time I will look at "POPEATER" unless they make the comments that are so wrong retract or apologize.

By Dubo

It's a part of life to work out any problems there are together and the Swayze's are a good example of each working together to overcome. Too bad most of the country sees trouble and divorce is there first option. Of course very few people have that kind of love. As to most of this discussion you are talking to TOM,who by his words, shows he's just taking the negative attitude to get a reaction. It amazes me how many people play into that instead of ignoring him.

By Carol

David, you are so right; however, there are those posting who are quick to judge and get some kind of release from their pathetic lives to point fingers and advise all of us how one should live their life. They are pathetic losers hiding behind a computer screen spewing garbage that no one wants to hear and certainly no one take seriously.

By kathy

drinking does affect the pancreas..you can get pancreatitis, (very painful) and when you abuse your body that much with alcohol...you reap what you sow...like smoking ,,cant smoke for years and not expect either lung cancer or copd.... its sad that this has to be learned so harshly....

By honeybunny

Low Ranked Vote down Vote up Report this

I see nothing sweet about Patrick Swayze. He was a drinker for years , with drugs to.. any one married to an alcaholic knows what that is. A zoo. Hw was not that good of a dancer either. All of these wonderful actors and actresses want to hide theit vile problems and then want sympathy from their fans. I say baloney to what you brought to you self. His eyes do not match either. Same color but one higherthan another. Must have been from falling down to much. Another Hollywood item gone.

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