Swayze Recounts Lowest Days in Memoir

By PopEater Staff Posted Sep 30th 2009 04:00PM

Patrick Swayze's intense battles with alcohol and depression nearly cost him his marriage earlier this decade, the late actor reveals for the first time in his book 'The Time of My Life,' released Tuesday.

His struggle with drink had long been a strain on his wife of 34 years, Lisa Niemi. In the book, he recounts a 10-year period spent drinking "copious amounts of alcohol" and later a 1993 incident where he kept passing out while shooting 'Father Hood.' Through it all, he and Lisa butted heads.

Around ten years later, Swayze, saddled with doubt about his career, sank into a deep depression. "I started drinking again," he writes.

"I found levels of bottom that I didn't even know existed, but, for Lisa, this was too much. She packed up a couple of suitcases and took off one morning before I woke up."

According to EW, Niemi moved to an apartment 20 minutes away from their ranch and stayed there a full year. They spoke every day, but didn't officially reunite until 2004, while he was filming 'King Solomon's Mines.' Still, it wasn't until three years later after they consulted a psychic (for his birthday) that they fully reignited their love for each other.

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Patrick & Lisa: A Love Story

A 19-year-old Swayze met Lisa Niemi in 1970 at his mother's dance studio and she immediately brought the cocky hunk and his ego down to earth. "She didn't buy any of my nonsense," he's said of their early days. "We spent half our dates in total silence as she wouldn't talk to me if she thought I was putting on an act." Five years later they were married. MORE PICS >>

Getty Images

Patrick and Lisa: A Love Story

Getty Images

In 1978, he landed the leading role in 'Grease' and five years later was cast by Francis Ford Coppola in 'The Outsiders.' During that time period, when he wasn't getting many meaty roles, his wife was his rock. "I'd be dead without her," Swayze told PEOPLE in 1984. "She helped me break my self-destructive tendencies. I was an insecure little baby. I don't ever see us apart." Pictured, the pair at the 1979 premiere of 'Skatetown USA.'

Frank Edwards, Getty Images

On a few occasions they were able to work together onscreen, including in the 1987 action film 'Steel Dawn.' "She's my creative partner," he said.

Everett Collection

Even Swayze's costars in some of his biggest films took notice of the strength of their marriage. "They're like a single organism," Kelly Lynch, Swayze's costar in 1989's 'Road House,' told PEOPLE. "She is a strong, strong woman – very funny, very kind, very smart. They love each other and it's apparent. The partnership is for life."

Frazer Harrison, Getty Images

Their ups and downs included bouts with alcoholism and a devastating miscarriage on Valentine's Day in 1990 that dashed their hopes of ever having children. "We just missed our window; we got so focused on our world and our careers that we missed the boat," he told PEOPLE in 2007.

Ethan Miller, Getty Images

Swayze looked great dancing with Jennifer Grey in 'Dirty Dancing,' but he first practiced all the moves with Niemi. She also inspired him to write the hit track, 'She's Like the Wind.'

Artisan Entertainment / Everett Collection

Swayze's final on-screen performances were in the A&E show, 'The Beast,' when he was in the midst of chemotherapy. Through it all, Niemi was always on the set and even directed an episode. She said: "He was fantastic. He had challenges because he was still doing chemo and it wasn't always easy, but he'd suit up and show up. He was always there ... He treated me like he was honored to show up on my set."

AP / FilmMagic

"A relationship survives because of keeping the friendship alive and learning how to fall in love over and over again and never taking the other person for granted and seeing things in a new light with new eyes," Patrick said in 2007. "We're big believers in, arguments are okay as long as it's not about your ego, but it's about a mutual goal -- trying to create something special."

Bauer-Griffin

"We've always been a team. We raise horses together, run a music business and a wildlife preserve together," Patrick once said of Lisa, both seen in 1979. "We have an unspoken language after all these years."

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"The way he looked at her, the way he held on to her, the way she smiled, I can't really imagine one without the other," Barbara Walters said about spending time with the couple in December 2008 on their California ranch for the TV special Patrick Swayze: The Truth. "That marriage is extraordinary."

Ron Tom, ABC / AP

A few months later, in January 2008, the 'Dirty Dancing' star was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.

In the audiotapes for the book, Swayze himself describes the moment he received the diagnosis. [Hear a snippet at Access Hollywood.]

"When my doctors at Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles said the words 'pancreatic cancer', a single thought popped into my head: 'I'm a dead man.'"

He continues: "Now, a lot of things go through your head when you get a death sentence handed to you, starting with, 'Why me?' It's hard not to sink into bitterness. For me, that initial shock quickly turned into self-criticism and blame."

Also in the book, Swayze reveals that his mom actually found out he had cancer from a National Enquirer reporter. He decided to keep the news from her because she had just received eye surgery and doctors warned her not to cry.

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Remembering Patrick Swayze

Patrick Swayze died Sept. 14 at the age of 57 after a nearly two-year battle with pancreatic cancer. Look back at the highlights of the beloved star's life >>>

Getty Images / Lionsgate Home Entertainment / AP / Paramount / Everett Collection

Stephen Lovekin, WireImage

Tags: lisa niemi, LisaNiemi, patrick swayze, PatrickSwayze, the time of my life, TheTimeOfMyLife

Comments

(129)

Wednesday 30 September

By mroneoftheguys

Vote down Vote up Report this

What is the number now???..3 billion humans on this ride called life and everyone of them...and that includes you reading this will be dead by the yr 2129...nearly all have or will do something rather pretty remarkable stupid ass stuff...he did some rather fun movies...lets leave the rather personal stuff as that....Personal.........

By Shelly

High Rank Vote down Vote up Report this

My grandfather died of pancreatic cancer at 72. he never wiggled or smoked or drank. To make a correlation like that is ridiculous and moronic. And everyone here seems to agree that you are a complete idiot! RIP Patrick - you made lots of people smile.

By Remi

So now Patrick Swayze's wiggling while dancing caused cancer? Give me a break! Stop pointing fingers at this or that, the man was talented, obviously very human and a loving person. Cancer happens for different reasons, sometimes we never know what the cause was, but don't be so stupid to say that his dancing caused it.

By Eddy

Swayze was gay

By diane

I love Patrick , it figures that just like other men he's human he had problems or his vice. Np one is perfect not even Patrick.

A wise women said you can not really change a man he is the person who he is you can only except them and try to understand them. All men have their unique vices. For a women it is can you love the man inspite of it or be there to help
them learn and overcome it only if they are willing to try . Sometimes it means walking away from a relationship for a while. Being a stronge woman. Or staying and still being a stronge woman.

Looks like she left so that he could understand that the drinking was taking a toll on their relationship and she left for a whole year. Most likely better no kids as it didn't take a toll on
them my dad drank and it devistated my mom and our family. I don't hate my dad I forgive him but it took it's toll on her. He hurt her badly.

Looks like they got past it and were going to have a happy life until the end but were cheeted out of
time he died way too young that cancer just is not a fair one. Micheal Landon died of it too. Just horrible he was strong through it and lived longer than the doctors thought he would.

Thursday 01 October

By itsmybusiness

@msb
I have read nearly every post from around the world that I could about Patrick Swayze's passing, but I must say, this is the most insensitive thing one could write. May I ask - What prompted this illicit response? Loneliness, obviously. There are other post rooms for you out there.

By mike

I am a man who appreciates a good joke. But that is not even remotely funny. Get a god damn life.

By Christie

Come on. Tom's comment about Patricks cancer being caused by "wriggling around" was either a bad stab at being funny, or done to get a rise out of everyone. If so, looks like he got what he wanted. Anyway - the person that wrote about the polio vaccine being a likely culprit is quite wise and raises a good point. Also - we cannot dismiss the chemical additives or pesticides in the food we eat, the water we drink, swim, bathe in and in the air we breathe. We take chemical medications for everything from a sniffle to a stressful day. Not to mention the constant low level radiation from electrical devices all around us. Cancer, diabetes and obesity are at an all time high and increases in pace with all of these "modernizations". Time to wake up people! Research organics and holistics - there is a growing revolution against the food and drug companies, become educated and lets work together to improve quality of life for our future generations!

By kuuipo018

It takes a lot of love and strength to overcome addiction. You can tell that Lisa dn him loved eachother very much.

By Vince Giordano

Eddie..you and MSB ought to get together...

I also think that Patrick and Lisa's relationship shows that people can be truely soulmates and I
feel for her to be without him now so sad and all
my hope that she is stronge .

Not everyone gets to love their soulmate sometimes you don't end up with them . You think you found them and it isn't so . You can tell that they knew
it sometimes you don't know who it is. Or if the person you have chosen is that person. Even in long relationships there are tough times. Times that try you they make or break a relationship.

It is good they found a way back to eachother it is a good love story with a very sad ending . Patrick will be missed for his dancing and acting and I think he was a gentelman and a good man even with his drinking issue he was human.

By Vince

Its a pity that these (I hate to identify them as reporters)have nothing better to do that right up some crap about people..and then the idiots who buy the rags to read these stories..and who wrote the comment about wiggling caused the cancer...you and your friends must really be a blast to be around...what do you people do have circle jerks to enjoy yourself...here's a trio for you...you , MSB and Eddie...you three can sit around and freak each other out with comments to each other...what fools yu (three) mortals be...

By Margaret

I am sorry that Patrick Swayze died from cancer because I had 2 daughters to die from that dreadful desease. One of my daughters never smoked and she had Leukima ( I wonder what causes Leukima?) and my other one died from cancer of the lung. they were young to, one 53 and the other was 54 My daughter that died from lung cancer smoked,but people die from lung cancer that never smoke. I pray a cure for cancer will soon be found, they suffered so.

By nadmon

we will die when we are supposed to die! stop worrying about it and live your life already! drink,smoke,have sex, have some fun for sake. because you never know when it will be your last day!

By Kim D

Patrick was my Man! He made my heart melt, he was so sexy!! I will miss him, and my heart go's out to Lisa and their family. No matter what his demons where, he lost the hardest battle of all cancer. I lost my little brother from cancer at age 38, so I know how hard it is to lose someone so dear to you.
With Love and God Bless.
P.S. To the ones who don't have anything nice to say! As you our Mom's told us, then don't say anything at all.

By Annette

What's with this disgusting habit of people sticking their tongues out in photos? Is this supposed to show them as sexual, or just plain disgusting as they are. Someone doesn't advertise unless they're selling something.What is she and those like her selling?

By Geegee Davis

I always wanted to say something about Patrick Swayze. He definitely had animal magnetism. Many women were physically attracted to him.. including me. I can't tell you why, though. There was just something very special about him.. "I think it was the spark he had in his eyes... and his pelvis and thighs." I envied his wife tremendously. I admit it. Lots of other women fantasized about him. He, somehow, seemed more REAL than lots of celebrities, so it was easy to just imagine him in our beds. He seemed touchable.. reachable.. and very human. We're just glad that he existed. Yes, we are. Thanks for taking time to read my comment. Do you agree with me? I know his wife will miss him physically a great deal. I know I would. What a lucky woman she was. UMMMMMMmmm.

By eilinda

Tom, I strongly suggest that you investigate and get active with the Lustgarten Foundation (pancreatic cancer)so that you can learn that wiggling around surely did not attribute to Patrick Swayze's death. If that were possible, Elvis would have been dead by the mid sixties.

By sharon

TRINAGURL:SPOKEN LIKE A TRUE,BITTER,TALENTLESS LOSER.

By debra

poor tom.bless you .you must mentally handicapped...lol;/ and im being sarcastic

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