Swayze Recounts Lowest Days in Memoir

By PopEater Staff Posted Sep 30th 2009 04:00PM

Patrick Swayze's intense battles with alcohol and depression nearly cost him his marriage earlier this decade, the late actor reveals for the first time in his book 'The Time of My Life,' released Tuesday.

His struggle with drink had long been a strain on his wife of 34 years, Lisa Niemi. In the book, he recounts a 10-year period spent drinking "copious amounts of alcohol" and later a 1993 incident where he kept passing out while shooting 'Father Hood.' Through it all, he and Lisa butted heads.

Around ten years later, Swayze, saddled with doubt about his career, sank into a deep depression. "I started drinking again," he writes.

"I found levels of bottom that I didn't even know existed, but, for Lisa, this was too much. She packed up a couple of suitcases and took off one morning before I woke up."

According to EW, Niemi moved to an apartment 20 minutes away from their ranch and stayed there a full year. They spoke every day, but didn't officially reunite until 2004, while he was filming 'King Solomon's Mines.' Still, it wasn't until three years later after they consulted a psychic (for his birthday) that they fully reignited their love for each other.

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Patrick & Lisa: A Love Story

A 19-year-old Swayze met Lisa Niemi in 1970 at his mother's dance studio and she immediately brought the cocky hunk and his ego down to earth. "She didn't buy any of my nonsense," he's said of their early days. "We spent half our dates in total silence as she wouldn't talk to me if she thought I was putting on an act." Five years later they were married. MORE PICS >>

Getty Images

Patrick and Lisa: A Love Story

Getty Images

In 1978, he landed the leading role in 'Grease' and five years later was cast by Francis Ford Coppola in 'The Outsiders.' During that time period, when he wasn't getting many meaty roles, his wife was his rock. "I'd be dead without her," Swayze told PEOPLE in 1984. "She helped me break my self-destructive tendencies. I was an insecure little baby. I don't ever see us apart." Pictured, the pair at the 1979 premiere of 'Skatetown USA.'

Frank Edwards, Getty Images

On a few occasions they were able to work together onscreen, including in the 1987 action film 'Steel Dawn.' "She's my creative partner," he said.

Everett Collection

Even Swayze's costars in some of his biggest films took notice of the strength of their marriage. "They're like a single organism," Kelly Lynch, Swayze's costar in 1989's 'Road House,' told PEOPLE. "She is a strong, strong woman – very funny, very kind, very smart. They love each other and it's apparent. The partnership is for life."

Frazer Harrison, Getty Images

Their ups and downs included bouts with alcoholism and a devastating miscarriage on Valentine's Day in 1990 that dashed their hopes of ever having children. "We just missed our window; we got so focused on our world and our careers that we missed the boat," he told PEOPLE in 2007.

Ethan Miller, Getty Images

Swayze looked great dancing with Jennifer Grey in 'Dirty Dancing,' but he first practiced all the moves with Niemi. She also inspired him to write the hit track, 'She's Like the Wind.'

Artisan Entertainment / Everett Collection

Swayze's final on-screen performances were in the A&E show, 'The Beast,' when he was in the midst of chemotherapy. Through it all, Niemi was always on the set and even directed an episode. She said: "He was fantastic. He had challenges because he was still doing chemo and it wasn't always easy, but he'd suit up and show up. He was always there ... He treated me like he was honored to show up on my set."

AP / FilmMagic

"A relationship survives because of keeping the friendship alive and learning how to fall in love over and over again and never taking the other person for granted and seeing things in a new light with new eyes," Patrick said in 2007. "We're big believers in, arguments are okay as long as it's not about your ego, but it's about a mutual goal -- trying to create something special."

Bauer-Griffin

"We've always been a team. We raise horses together, run a music business and a wildlife preserve together," Patrick once said of Lisa, both seen in 1979. "We have an unspoken language after all these years."

Getty Images

"The way he looked at her, the way he held on to her, the way she smiled, I can't really imagine one without the other," Barbara Walters said about spending time with the couple in December 2008 on their California ranch for the TV special Patrick Swayze: The Truth. "That marriage is extraordinary."

Ron Tom, ABC / AP

A few months later, in January 2008, the 'Dirty Dancing' star was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.

In the audiotapes for the book, Swayze himself describes the moment he received the diagnosis. [Hear a snippet at Access Hollywood.]

"When my doctors at Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles said the words 'pancreatic cancer', a single thought popped into my head: 'I'm a dead man.'"

He continues: "Now, a lot of things go through your head when you get a death sentence handed to you, starting with, 'Why me?' It's hard not to sink into bitterness. For me, that initial shock quickly turned into self-criticism and blame."

Also in the book, Swayze reveals that his mom actually found out he had cancer from a National Enquirer reporter. He decided to keep the news from her because she had just received eye surgery and doctors warned her not to cry.

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Remembering Patrick Swayze

Patrick Swayze died Sept. 14 at the age of 57 after a nearly two-year battle with pancreatic cancer. Look back at the highlights of the beloved star's life >>>

Getty Images / Lionsgate Home Entertainment / AP / Paramount / Everett Collection

Stephen Lovekin, WireImage

Tags: lisa niemi, LisaNiemi, patrick swayze, PatrickSwayze, the time of my life, TheTimeOfMyLife

Comments

(129)

Wednesday 30 September

By geraldine grant

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what a sweet man! this man had problems yes, but he also had a whole lotta character!

Thursday 01 October

By keegan

Lowest Rank Vote down Vote up Report this

yuck he didn't age very well

By Brandi

This comment is actually directed at Keegan-You are STUPID and DISRESPECTFUL. "yuck, he didn't age well" He had cancer! Do you know what a terminal disease does to a person's body? How bout you go get yourself a terminal disease and see how well you "age". People like you should just crawl back in the hole you came out of, same goes for you too Tom! Complete Morons! RIP Patrick Swayze prayers to his family and friends.

By BrokeDog

Very few of us (in long relationships), don't have "rough patches" that threaten said relationships. Our strength comes from working together to get thru them, and persevere. Then, right when you think you've got the ship righted, you get hit with "cancer" ... very, very tough going!
It appears Patrick and Lisa worked very hard to beat this, and keep re-building their relationship ... and I admire that, deeply! My prayers go out to Lisa and the rest of the family!

By Allison M. Kramer

Wow, refreshing to find you and some people here on the internet actually have brains...and hearts.

By lori

Really? Surely you aren't truly that cruel in real life. Surely you are just trying to get a rise out of someone...guess it worked. I truly hope you are just playinga cruel joke out of stupidity. I feel sorry for you.

By dewey00

Hey, msb - lot's of people care. You're the one that should keep quiet.

By paul S.

REST IN PEACE. YOU WERE A GOOD MAN! WE ARE ALL HUMAN.

By angie

how unbelievable you are for even saying that. Patrick was a very talented person. No one knows exactly where cancer comes from and you are a very mean and thoughtless person to say that. Obviously you have never lost a spouse or a significant other to cancer. I hope you never do. It is a very horrible and painful thing to go through for the victim and their families. So you should rethink what you just wrote and quit assuming that he got it from dancing. Cancer cells lay dormant until something is triggers it. You need to do your research before you post another stupid and thoughless statement.

By Deb

You're an idiot!

By Tim

Tom,
I think that is by far the stupidest comment I have ever heard in my entire life. Have you killed all of your brain cells or were you just shortchanged by one or both of your parents?

By beatlesfan

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It was probably the in-breeding....

By David

That is the problem with alcohol. Socially, it is acceptable, but when life takes a bad turn, many turn to a bad life. When your only desire is to be unconscious so you do not have to face your problems, alcohol becomes not just a crutch but a companion. At least Swayze had the guts to tell the world it screwed up his life.

DG

By Trizone

I don't know how you are supposed to react to news of this magnitude. News telling you that your life is over and you must start counting down the days you have left and say goodbye to those you love, and prepare to go. If there is any way to describe this man's departure, it would be with unbelievable dignity and courage. My thoughts are with those who loved him so much and with those that will miss him. God bless!

By Bill

Hey Tom, If it's somehow humanly possible to get mouth cancer from running yours like the complete and total fool you are, then I really do hope that the Big C awaits you because that was THE dumbest thing I've heard from anyone today.

By James

Tom, you have to be the biggest dipsh*t that ever lived. If you ever had an original thought I am sure it died of lonliness.

By michelle

you are an heartless person

By Annie

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Is there anyone in Hollywood who isn't a drunk, druggie or mental mess??

By vikki

TOM YOU ARE A FULL BLOWN IDIOT.....YOU KNOW WHY YOU DONT HAVE IT??????? THE GOOD DIE YOUNG AND THE JERKS LIVE ON FOREVER....HEY GET A LIFE AND SHUT THE HELL UP

By BIGROBB2

MSB--I HOPE PAT'S BROTHERS FIND YOU-AND CUT YOUR LITTLE PRICK OFF

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