Stay Home With Hollywood This New Year's Eve

By Mike Ryan Posted Dec 31st 2009 12:40PM

Hey, it's almost 2010! With all the decade retrospectives, isn't it a little hard not to be, well, already a little sick of 2010? We get it; it's the end of the decade. Big deal. So, perhaps you're not too excited about celebrating the new year in public because (A) You don't happen to have any friends anyway or (B) you think New Year's Eve is amateur hour or (C), you're being dragged to a party on a night it's supposed to snow and you are starting to conveniently come down with a cold. Regardless, for those who want to just enjoy the comfort of their Snuggie and a bowl of dip, here are some New Year's Eve-related ways to entertain yourself while staying at home ... nursing your fake cold.

'Trading Places'

If attending a New Year's Eve party on Amtrak with current junior senator from Minnesota, Al Franken, and Jim Belushi wearing a monkey costume is your idea of a good time, then, yes, this film's for you. Oh, and also, Eddie Murphy and Dan Aykroyd make appearances. Plus, there's added bonus of trying to figure out what might be the most confusing ending to a film that's not at all supposed to be a complicated movie. (Honestly, we had to look up the rules for futures trading on Wikipedia to even try to understand how Louis and Billy Ray bankrupted the Duke brothers.)

How I Met Your Mother 'The Limo'

New Year's Eve has a special way of being terrible no matter how much thought and preparation are put into the evening. Blame it on the high expectations. Ted Mosby thought he had the perfect plan: Rent a limo to keep everyone together for a multi-party night in New York City. What possibly could go wrong? Well, traffic, for one. But, as this episode proves, as long as you're with friends you want to spend time with; with an armed man who looks like Moby; listening to 'You Give Love a Bad Name' by Bon Jovi on a constant loop, well, that's all that matters, right? (I almost forgot, we have no friends we want to spend time with. That's why we're at home. Please disregard this entry.)

'200 Cigarettes'

If there's ever a reason to not go out on New Year's Eve, it very well could be this: You could wind up at a restaurant next to Kate Hudson and Jay Mohr on a date. And, besides, other than riding with a fun cab driver that looks a lot like Dave Chappelle, this film addresses every horror story of what can go wrong on New Year's Eve -- and this was 1979! When nightlife was considered fun! Also, we can't get over the fact that Elvis Costello appears in this film and plays himself, even though it's set 20 years before. Couldn't they have at least used some of the age special effects they used on Patrick Stewart in 'X-Men 3'?

'When Harry Met Sally'

Is just one New Year's Eve not good enough for you? This movie has two of them! And will keep the dream alive that your long-time friend, that you share every secret with, is actually the person you're going to marry. Seriously, how many lives has this film ruined? One thousand? Ten thousand? This isn't even taking into consideration the poor souls who paid money to see Billy Crystal in 'Forget Paris,' a film that couldn't exist without the success of 'When Harry Met Sally.'

The Video for U2's 'New Years Day'

Who doesn't enjoy mixing some early 1980's European politics in with their reveling? It's about time we stayed home for an evening and figured out this whole Polish Solidarity movement that Bono is singing about. Plus, there is nothing about this video that would make us want to venture outside. There's snow everywhere. There are explosions. It looks very cold. Poland is cold. Sweden, where this video was filmed, is cold. Wouldn't it be better just to stay inside? Yes, it would! Besides, nothing changes on New Year's Day.

'Strange Days'

When this film -- set in 1999 on the eve of the new millennium (depending who you speak with) -- was released, it was greeted with very mixed reviews. Do you remember who directed 'Strange Days'? It was Kathryn Bigelow, who very well may have directed the best movie of 2009 -- 'The Hurt Locker.' Considering the greatness of 'The Hurt Locker,' it just begs for another look at 'Strange Days,' really her only other film to take a serious look at controversial issues of the day. We would be remiss if we didn't also suggest 'Strange Days' be immediately followed by another of Bigelow's films, 'Point Break,' but for entirely different reasons. Yes, the director of 'The Hurt Locker' also directed 'Point Break'! Rest in peace, Bodhi.

'Friends' ... The One With the Routine

This could be you! Or, more likely, someone dancing right next to you, a dance they've been perfecting their entire lives. One of the few episodes of 'Friends' that still makes us laugh today, Ross and Monica are invited to be background dancers for a taping of Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve. Discouraged because they were not invited to dance on the platform -- where they are sure to be seen on television -- they decide to perform The Routine, a dance they created in the eighth grade. A dance that Ross proudly admits won an Honorable Mention in the Brother/Sister dance category. A dance that will, probably, come to think of it, make you the hit of every New Year's Eve party the rest of your life because everyone will know you're doing The Routine from 'Friends.' Our advice: Stay home this New Year's Eve and learn The Routine.