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'Monster House' Writer Dan Harmon Responds to Terrified 7-Year-Old, Slams Spielberg

By Zach Dionne Posted Mar 29th 2010 02:17PM

'Monster House' Writer Dan Harmon Called Stephen Spielberg a Moron After the Film Frightened a Young Girl

Blogger Kelly Oxford's seven-year-old daughter became "plagued with nightmares" after watching the animated film 'Monster House.' So Oxford wrote to the film's co-writer (and 'Community' creator) Dan Harmon -- who happened to be a friend of a friend -- and received what she called an "immediate and amazing" response.

Most notable is Harmon's skewering of executive producer Steven Spielberg as "a moron" and director Gil Kenan as "a hack," but the full reply is genuinely heartfelt and honest. "Your Mom told me about 'Monster House' scaring you," Harmon's e-mail begins. "It sounds like one of the things that upset you is the fact that the house kept wanting to hurt people even after nobody wanted to hurt it anymore. I will tell you a secret that sounds so silly you might not believe it, but this is true: I never finished writing 'Monster House' before my bosses turned it into a movie."

Read more after the jump.

"She only watched it the second time because she was struck by the fact that 4-year-old Henry [her brother] was completely unfazed by it and figured it couldn't have been so scary," Oxford wrote to Harmon. "It's been three nights of her waking up crying and I totally blame you. You should come over and rationalize the entire thing to her. Okay, maybe you could just write her a note because she doesn't believe I know the creator of her nightmares."

In his reply, Harmon said he was mad the movie had scared Oxford's daughter, Salinger. "I tried to tell them they were making a bad movie that was going to confuse and frighten smart children, instead of making children more brave, and they acted like I was stupid for being afraid that would happen," Harmon wrote. The letter also includes the following:

"I think a good story, even if it is sad or scary while you're watching it, should always make you a little less scared after you've seen it. Because even a scary story, if it's a good scary story, takes us into strange, dark places that don't make sense at first, and helps us see that they do make sense, and are therefore not so scary. And that didn't happen in 'Monster House.' The kids go inside the house, and everything's scary in there, but nothing starts making more sense.

And why, after they escaped the house, did that old man tell them another scary story about a mean fat lady that didn't make very much sense either? I'll tell you why. Because Gil Kenan is a hack and Steven Spielberg is a moron. But hey, I shouldn't be dumping this stuff on you.

Let's just say, Salinger, that I have a lot of questions about that movie, too.

I guess you and I are just smarter than other people, and I guess part of being smart is being scared of things that don't scare other people. Henry's a little younger than us and he just thinks the movie looks cool, which it does. And we won't take that away from him. But you and I are looking at the movie through smart, sensitive, older eyes, and we can see how confusing it is.

Who knows what kind of amazing things you will be doing as you live your life. But we know one thing for sure: you are going to be very special while you're doing it, and you're going to remove a lot of fear from other people's lives, because you're smart enough to see it, which means you're smart enough to conquer it.

I hope one day I can finish writing a movie that they don't change so much, and if you see it, I hope it makes you happy. Until then, I heard that 'Wall-E' is very good, you should go see that. And next time 'Monster House' is on, just remember that the guy that wrote it told you it was dumb."

We might've recommended 'Ratatouille,' but it's safe to say one seven-year-old girl's day was made, regardless.

It should be noted Harmon backpedaled a bit on his Twitter, saying, "The only thing Spielberg did to 'Monster House' was give it a chance to be seen. I don't think I ever even met the guy. Spielberg ain't no moron, I was just mad."

Watch the 'Monster House' trailer:

Tags: Dan Harmon

Comments

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Monday 29 March

By AJ

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Get over it- Mom needs to explain that it is a silly movie. There are things that scare kids all the time. It's a parents job to ease those fears. This movie is so not scary- my 2 year old daughter loves it!! She is scared of toilets flushing so perhaps I should write a blog about that. Maybe a response from the toilet manufacturer would ease her fears.

Monday 29 March

By Lily

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I blame Mom...parents should be watching these movies with their kids and telling them if they show the slightest fear that its a cartoon and isnt real. If the child continues to show they are scared then TURN IT OFF. You are the parent they are the film makers. Its YOUR job not theirs to filter what your child sees and frankly at 7 years old they should know the difference between real and make believe. Now you have put the writer in the position to have made a mistake because he was angry and it could hurt his career. Nice going Mom...perhaps some parenting classes and anger management should be in your future. oh , and stop writing people over your failure to calm your children.

Monday 29 March

By Shauna

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Lily said "...and frankly at 7 years old they should know the difference between real and make believe."

I have two sons. One is seven and the other is eight. Both are very creative and have vivid imaginations. They do know the difference between real and make believe. However, these kind of movies can and do cause their little minds to go wild and often they cause intense nightmares.

Knowing the difference and not being effected by it are two totally different things.

I do agree that it is my job as their mom to protect them and to shut off a movie if it is too much for them to handle.

Monday 29 March

By brian

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"Now you have put the writer in the position to have made a mistake because he was angry and it could hurt his career. Nice going Mom..."

I think he is as responsible for his actions as the mom is. By the way, I agree with him.

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