Saying Goodbye to the Cougar Trend

By John Mitchell Posted May 23rd 2010 12:00PM

Like so many pop culture fads, the cougar trend burned bright and fast. A few years back, everyone was very happy to learn that -- gasp! -- women over the age of 40 could still be sexy. Suddenly, there was a preponderance of evidence -- from Michelle Pfeiffer to Demi Moore, Courtney Cox to Halle Berry -- and it was so shocking and exciting and new that everybody wanted a piece of the trend. But now, it appears to waning.

The craze may well have breathed its last breath this week when 53-year-old Kim Cattrall revealed she was denied a magazine cover when she refused to pose with a real-life cougar. Speaking to EXTRA, the 'Sex and the City 2' star said, "I really take umbrage to the code 'cougar.' I think cougar has a negative connotation, and I don't see anything negative about Samantha and her sexuality, sensuality and choice. I don't think she stands or sits in bars waiting for young men to prey on."

Cattrall declined to name the magazine.

Having Cattrall, a five-time Emmy nominee and Golden Globe winner who is about a week away from starring in what will likely be one of the year's biggest films, pose with an animal as some sort of elaborate metaphor for how she too is on the prowl is pretty exhausting, maybe a little offensive and arguably downright sexist. That she stood her ground and refused to allow some magazine to make a buck by presenting her as some sort of ludicrous caricature because she single, attractive and older than most cover girls is commendable.

Salon's Rebecca Traister laments that while celebrating older women is a good thing, the term itself is a massive step in the wrong direction. "How sad and backward that we have to give it a nickname, animalize it as if it's outside the boundaries of civilized human behavior, make it a trend, pretend that Demi Moore invented it. That's not progress, and it's not a step forward for women." Before the cougar craze took off, she notes: "When Cher used to date Rob Camilletti, I think they called him a 'boy toy,' and they called her 'Cher.'"

(Though, we find it equally insulting to refer to a full-grown man as a powerful woman's play thing -- just sayin.' See also: Ciccone, Madonna and Luz, Jesus.)

Indeed, foxy ladies of all ages have long taken offense to the term. Last year, while promoting her film 'Cheri,' in which she played a courtesan who seduces a much younger man, Michelle Pfeiffer told InStyle, "I so hate that term! Colette wrote these novels so long ago, but even today they're ahead of their time in the way we perceive women's power and sexuality."

Now, the ABC hit 'Cougar Town,' starring Courteney Cox, which began its run last fall as a sometimes-raunchy sex farce about an older woman seducing younger men, is looking to change its name.

Back in March, Cox's husband David Arquette talked to PopEater about his wife's cougar status, admitting that while he thinks it's funny, "She's played such a great character and the writers have done such a good job that I think it's transcended the initial 'cougar' drawing." He also gave PopEater an early heads up that series creator Bill Lawrence was considering the name change.

Speaking to HitFix, Lawrence said, "I'd like to [change the title], and the studio has been talking about it for three reasons: One, partly as a result of common sense and partly from their research, they find too many instances of testing of people saying they would never watch a show called 'Cougar Town' ... and then they screen an episode, and people go, 'Oh, I would watch this show.'" He also noted that the series has grown away from its premise now that Cox's character, Jules, is no longer on the hunt for younger men and is seeing Josh Hopkins' character Grayson, who is also in his forties.

By most estimates, the show is the better for it, and even Cox herself has seemed pretty over it -- the title, that is, not the show -- in recent interviews.

We knew the trend's days were officially numbered when beloved national grandmother Betty White joked about being a cougar. While we certainly don't begrudge White getting her kicks while she can, and still laugh when she jokes that Robert Redford is the only thing she has left to do in Hollywood, by the time she reached it, the joke itself was too stale to be saved -- even by the always-hilarious White. (And it certainly says something -- in and of itself -- that the term was already a past-its-prime parody when White used it to promote her hosting gig on 'Saturday Night Live.')

And so now it looks like we're going to have to look at Pfeiffer, Cox, Cattrall and other aging actress for what they really are: confident, successful women whose talent has kept them in the spotlight beyond an arbitrary media-determined sell-by date. Rather than agree to hide behind some sort of cartoon send-up of what an attractive older woman is, these ladies are redefining how we see life after you spot that first wrinkle. It's kind of sad that we're still here, that we're still not as comfortable as we probably should be with older women expressing their sexuality, but nevertheless, here we are.

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Kim Cattrall Snapshots

Kim Cattrall attends The Laurence Olivier Awards at the Grosvenor House Hotel in London, England. More photos >>

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Kim Cattrall Snapshots

Kim Cattrall is seen on April 21, 2010 in London, England. Celebrity Sightings In London - April 21, 2010 London, England United Kingdom April 21, 2010 Photo by Niki Nikolova/FilmMagic.com To license this image (60229247), contact FilmMagic.com

Kim Cattrall Snapshots

© BAUER-GRIFFIN.COM Actress Kim Cattrall gives a fan a hug outside of BBC Radio Two studios. NON-EXCLUSIVE April 14, 2010 Job: 100414M1 London, England www.bauergriffin.com www.bauergriffinonline.com [KGC-04]

Kim Cattrall Snapshots

©BAUER-GRIFFIN.COM The prestigious Laurence Olivier Awards at the Grosvenor House Hotel in central London. Picture Shows: Kim Cattrall and Simon Paisley Day NON-EXCLUSIVE March 21, 2010 Job: 100322Z2 London, England www.bauergriffin.com www.bauergriffinonline.com

Kim Cattrall Snapshots

LONDON, ENGLAND - MARCH 21: Kim Cattrall attends the Laurence Olivier Awards at Grosvenor House, on March 21, 2010 in London, England. (Photo by Ian Gavan/Getty Images) *** Local Caption *** Kim Cattrall

Kim Cattrall Snapshots

© BAUER-GRIFFIN.COM The 2010 Laurence Olivier Awards held at the Grosvenor House Hotel on Park Lane. Picture shows: Kim Cattrall NON-EXCLUSIVE March 21, 2010 Job: 100321M7 London, England www.bauergriffin.com www.bauergriffinonline.com [KGC-03]

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Tags: betty white, cougar town, courteney cox, demi moore, Kim Cattrall, michelle pfeiffer, sex and the city 2

Comments

(113)

Sunday 23 May

By ric

Vote down Vote up Report this

CAN YOU SAY, G A Y ????????

By sleepyhead

High Rank Vote down Vote up Report this

Hey Bob The Wimp, with a screen name like that, you won't get any kitten, tiger, or cougar or mountain lioness!

By Synclaire

I am 8 years older than my husband we have been together since 1990. I never stalked him through the jungle or attacked him from behind while he grazed in the fields So I too take umbridge to the term cougar.

Hahahahaha! My sister is a "cougar", she hid behind some bushes to get her man!

By pmbalele

Low Ranked Vote down Vote up Report this

John Mitchell you're a racist. You did not mention any Black women in your article that they can be sexy as White women. You are one of those White people who still reason the old way that Black women cannot be beautiful. Think about my reaction and respond to me.

By dsherline

Isn't that something. Someone always has to pull the race card. Un fuc*ing believable.

Monday 24 May

By cirujo

Umm, honey, the article was about the term "cougar" being used to describe older women who date younger men.

This was not an article about race. Why do you feel the need to turn it into a race issue? There was absolutely nothing at all in the original article that had anything to do with race.

By John Mitchelle

Pmbalele..I did not mention black women because you people don't look 40 until you're well into your 50s. Your Cougars are our senior citizens

By Workergy

Why si any term used??? Being older if you look good go for it !!! ANyone who takes care of themself and gets a younger person right away they look down on it...lOl look if the people involved are happy good for them. A 21 year old dating some twice their age go for it. I guess those who object maybe jealous...LOL lookif you work at taking cre of yourself and can still pull off the look more power to you but those who have left themselves go ......keep getting pissed at the ones who didn't....LOL

By phurbee951

Why does the author of this crap think being with a man of the same age or older makes a woman less sexy?

By cchucklest1

i agree with dwight, the guys i know are not looking for older women. they like young women. there are a few decent looking older women but not that many. i will also bet you that demi moore will not be aston kuchter's last wife. she is to old.and please don't count madonna as an attractive older women.

By Diana B.

If a woman who dates younger men is called a "cougar," what is the term for an old guy who only goes for younger women?

By Dirty Old Man

Diana B, my name says it all. I wonder if these women that get their panties in a wad about being called cougars would rather be called "Dirty Old Women!"

By lulu

My "boyfriend" is 25 years younger than i am, and it works! He is my lover and my best friend. We may not grow old together, but no one is promised another day. We cherish the time we have. Not a bad way to live!

Hey be happy! That Justin Timberlake likes older women, he dated Cameron Diaz for a long time.

Hi LuLu you better watch out, you might get a low rank if you offend people, which you don't.

I see nothing wrong with an older woman with a younger man nor an older man with a younger woman. Many young women and men find older men and older women attractive, intelligent, funny, fun and, many times experienced, thank God. I love my role as a "dirty old man" as I am sure that cougars love their role as cougars. As long as older men and women don't let themselves go and not groom themselves well or get fat I hope that we will be in great demand for a long time.

The only trend I see is the trend of the media to inaccurately use the word cougar to describe women who prefer to be with men younger than themselves. If that's the trend this article is referring to than good.
There have always been and will always be women who prefer younger men. So what?
Occasionally the term cougar is accurate but it isn't when the media applies it to every single older woman/younger man relationship.
In the wild a cougar strikes swiftly, devours it prey quickly, then moves on. Does that sound like an accurate description of, oh, let's say Demi and Ashton? Not by a long shot.
So yeah, let's hope this trend of labelling every woman who's in a relationship with a man younger than she is as a cougar is a trend we will be saying goodbye to.

By Julie

No, older women with younger men is not a trend that is "over". What is over is people acting so shocked by it as if it is weird. Just because "showbiz" is over something doesn't mean we are. They have been over women after the age of 29 for years so why is this hard to believe?

By Sandman

Trend? The whole recent "cougar" label is preposterous and insulting. Way before this ridiculous cougar label was invented by some writer or whatever, when I was in my late 30's I started dating guys 13-16 years younger than me because it is just my natural inclination. I don't know why but that is just who I'm attracted to. Is it a trend that older men and women are attracted to younger mean and women and some attracted to older? I don't think people are necessarily always looking for a certain age, but drawn to a certain type, personality, person with interests that may or may not be youth driven. This has been going on since the beginning of time. what is the big deal?

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