How Belinda Carlisle Beat a 30-Year Drug Habit

To Belinda Carlisle's fans, the gorgeous Go-Go appeared to have it all. She led a charmed life complete with musical success, a great marriage and unmatched beauty. But underneath it all, the singer has had her share of struggles. "I hit a lot of bottoms," she tells
PopEater while discussing her searing new memoir, 'Lips Unsealed.' Those lows had an awful lot to do with a cocaine habit that grabbed hold of her for 30 years. Now 51, she's been sober only five years. "I don't know why it took me so long," she says. Her inspiration? The thought of her teenage son, Duke, whose dad is Morgan Mason, one day finding his mom dead of an overdose. "That's pretty low," she tells us. "You can't be my age and doing the amount of cocaine I was doing."
In our full interview, Carlisle talks candidly about how she kicked coke, the painful criticism about her weight ("It really messed my head up"), feeling bad for old friend
Fergie and having no regrets about her gloriously-debauched days in The Go-Go's.
Your book made me sad! You struggled for so long.
Actually, it'd be really sad if it didn't have a happy ending. I'm glad I went through all that actually, and I'm really, really happy with where I'm at today.
How many years were you hooked on cocaine?
Probably 30 years with nine months off from drugs when I was pregnant. Everyday pretty much.
I remember reading about you living in the south of France, married to this really handsome guy and thinking you had an amazing life.
You never ever know what's going on underneath the surface. I think the thing that kept me going along for so long is I clean up really well. I could afford to have facials and massages and dress nicely and fool myself even that I was OK and fool everyone around me that I was OK, living in the south of France, jet-setting everywhere, looking great. Everything must be perfect. You know, I held it together and I gave that impression for years and years, but I think the last couple of years I wasn't fooling anybody.
What's amazing is that you didn't go to rehab.
I thought if it wasn't going to work, I'd go to rehab. That was kind of the last thing. I made so many promises to so many people so many times through the years that I was going to stop and I couldn't keep it and I knew it deep down inside. I hit a lot of bottoms. I don't know why it took me so long. I guess I just wasn't ready. It was weird when I quit. I was struck. I just knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I would be dead if I continued. I just knew it came down to choosing life or death, and I chose life. I was at the end of a three-day binge. I remember thinking how humiliating it would be for my son to have his mom die in a hotel room of a cocaine overdose. That's pretty low. I knew if I didn't stop I'd be dead. You can't be my age and doing the amount of cocaine I was doing.
You were friends with Fergie. What's your take on what's being going on?
I feel really bad for her. Honestly, I couldn't even watch the tape. It's horrible. I feel really bad for her. To do something like that, you've got to be in a really bad place. God knows what she was thinking, but I feel really, really bad and embarrassed for her. I haven't seen her in ages. I just hung out with her that one summer. It was just one of those summer flings, I guess.
Over the years, the press really focused on your weight.
It really messed my head up. It really affected me in some ways. It really pushes my buttons today, although not as much because I figure if I'm going to be age fifty and obsess about that kind of stuff then something really wrong is going on. It absolutely fed into my whole eating disorder
How do you eat now?
It's funny because I haven't been in America in over a year until coming here for the book, and it's different in Europe and India, where I spend a lot of time. I forget what it's like. My eating habits are totally normal, I never deprive myself, and I just don't eat like a pig. I think I have a healthy relationship with food now. I do know that when I spend too much time in LA it messes with my head. In some ways, it's such a hard place to live in. It's really tough if you have any insecurities at all. I think being a woman in American society, where they definitely put emphasis on how much you weigh, it's just too tough.
Your son came out to you as a teen.
If there are any parents out there who are struggling with knowing their kid is gay, wanting to throw them out or not loving them -- which I don't understand at all -- then I hope this book helps. So I know if this can open somebody's mind just a little bit then I'm glad I wrote the book.
Is that why you included it?
It was a big deal in my life when my son came out to me. Most of my friends are gay and lesbian, but when it's your own kid ... My son's openly gay, so it wasn't like I was revealing anything. My son said the same thing -- that maybe it'll help some parent who's unaccepting of their child's sexuality.
What do you think of the current crop of female singers?
Honestly, I don't pay that much attention to new music. There's some good music out there though. I love Beyonce, Rihanna, Florence and the Machine.
The Go-Go's were quite debauched in their day.
Well, we were just doing what the boys did. I mean why not? We were young, we were rich, no responsibilities. We were famous and we had a good time with it. We had a great time.
What's a typical day for you?
If I'm home, I get up and do yoga and go for a hike and then I take an old lady nap. I read a lot. Same thing at my place in Goa, India.
How does one get friendly enough with you to score an invite to your house in France?
We're pretty private. It's funny because Sandra Bernhard was saying, "You've never invited us to your house," and I was like, "I never really think about it." I'm so over the place. This past year, I've hardly been there myself.
So the answer is you can't.
(Laughs) Yeah.
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Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
Belinda Carlisle visits 'Good Morning America' on June 1 to promote her memoir, 'Lips Unsealed.' Check out more pics of the bonafide music icon >>
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Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
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Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
Singer Belinda Carlisle sighting in Covent Garden on November 25, 2009 in London, England. Celebrity Sightings In London - November 25, 2009 London, England United Kingdom November 25, 2009 Photo by Nat Jag/FilmMagic.com To license this image (59008405), contact FilmMagic.com
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
LISBON, PORTUGAL - MAY 29: Belinda Carlisle performs as part of the 'Here and Now Tour' at Pavilhao Atlantico on May 29, 2009 in Lisbon, Portugal. (Photo by Rui M. Leal/Getty Images) *** Local Caption *** Belinda Carlisle
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
DANCING WITH THE STARS 8 After two exciting and impressive performance shows, the first couple to be eliminated on the Season Eight premiere of "Dancing with the Stars The Results Show" with its first ever "Dance Off," was Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts. Airs Tuesday, March 17, 2009.
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
DANCING WITH THE STARS 8 Carrie Ann Inaba, Len Goodman, Bruno Tonioli, Tom Bergeron, Samantha Harris, Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts star in the "Episode 802A" - After two exciting and impressive performance shows, the first couple to be eliminated on the Season Eight premiere of "Dancing with the Stars The Results Show" with its first ever "Dance Off," was Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts. Airs Tuesday, March 17, 2009.
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
DANCING WITH THE STARS 8 Tom Bergeron, Samantha Harris, Belinda Carlisle, Jonathan Roberts star in the "Episode 802A" - After two exciting and impressive performance shows, the first couple to be eliminated on the Season Eight premiere of "Dancing with the Stars The Results Show" with its first ever "Dance Off," was Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts. Airs Tuesday, March 17, 2009.
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
DANCING WITH THE STARS 8 Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts star in the "Episode 802A" - After two exciting and impressive performance shows, the first couple to be eliminated on the Season Eight premiere of "Dancing with the Stars The Results Show" with its first ever "Dance Off," was Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts. Airs Tuesday, March 17, 2009.
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
DANCING WITH THE STARS 8 Lil' Kim, Derek Hough, Belinda Carlisle, Jonathan Roberts, Edyta Sliwinska, Lawrence Taylor, Lacey Schwimmer, Steve-O, Cheryl Burke, Giles Marini, Julianne Hough, Chuck Wicks, Holly Madison, Dmitry Chaplin, Chelsie Hightower, Ty Murray, Shawn Johnson, Mark Ballas, Karina Smirnoff, Steve Wozniak, Kym Johnson, David Alan Grier, Denise Richards, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, Melissa Rycroft and Tony Dovolani star in the "Episode 802A" - After two exciting and impressive performance shows, the first couple to be eliminated on the Season Eight premiere of "Dancing with the Stars The Results Show" with its first ever "Dance Off." Airs Tuesday, March 17, 2009.
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
DANCING WITH THE STARS 8 Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts star in the "Episode 802A" - In a thrilling new twist, the bottom two couples facing elimination, Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts, and Steve Wozniak and Karina Smirnoff, determined by the lowest combined viewer votes and judges' scores from the first two weeks of the competition, performed a "Dance Off" to determine who was dismissed in the first Results Show. The couples selected one of the two dances they have performed to dance for new scores from the judges for that specific dance. The judges' scores from the "Dance Off" performance replaced their scores from the first two weeks. A combination of just the new judges' scores from the "Dance Off" dance, along with viewers votes from both Mondays' shows, were calculated following the "Dance Off." Airs Tuesday, March 17, 2009.
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
DANCING WITH THE STARS 8 Chelsie Hightower and Ty Murray star in the "Episode 802A" - After two exciting and impressive performance shows, the first couple to be eliminated on the Season Eight premiere of "Dancing with the Stars The Results Show" with its first ever "Dance Off," was Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts. Airs Tuesday, March 17, 2009.
Belinda Carlisle Snapshots
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i thought that too as belinda has matured she looks a lot like priscilla before priscilla ruined her very pretty face with botched surgery
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I am glad to see a happy ending to the never ending drug abuse scene. To do it without rehab must have been very hard to do. Congrats on staying clean Belinda.... remember, one day at a time!
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Why is it so hard to do without rehab, I know alot of people that quit without going to rehab and they were some hardcore crackheads and dope fiends. I also know a few people that went to rehab and still do drugs. You dont need rehab to quit, you just need a reason and the desire.
onefooltoomany
If she quit for the 9 months she was pregnant (which I don't believe)thern it wasn't as much of a habit as she'd like us to believe. Most people get very thin on cocaine- is she wirde backwards?
@onefooltoomany- just to be clear, she didn't go to inpatient rehab in 2005 when she quit, but she did get in a 12-step program. Very few people can quit permanently without the support of a program.
wow shes so beautiful in that shiny blouse dident even recognised her at 51. i have many people for years to do coke ice you name i never took it up. and never will no matter how depresed i am or how much money i have. a friend will share there drugs with you a true friend wont
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GOOD FOR YOU , ALTHOUGH COKE ISNT MUCH TO KICK , MOSTLY MENEAL , I KICKED A HEROIN HABIT OF 18 YEARS AND HAVE BEEN CLEAN 28 YEARS , WISH I HAD THOSE 18 YEARS AND THE MONEY NOW , GOOD LUCK TO YOU GIRL
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you go belinda now please''REGROUP THE 'GO GO'S ONE HELL OF A GIRL BAND!!!!!!!!!!
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sorry for typo , meant mental
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Belinda, so glad you said "yes" to life. Me too. Don't feel bad about waiting so long, I am 49 and will be 1 1/2 years sober this June 15th. You are an inspiration. Thanks.
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god bless you belinda!!!!!!!!!!! you never gave up!!!! your son is lucky to have a great mother like you!!!!!!! keep up the good work!!!!!
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Great Mother?!?!? Ahem. A great mother sacrifices her desires, needs, wants, indeed, her life, for her children. This is not a great mother. This is a drug addict who had a child while she was a drug addict. And stayed a drug addict. Anyone can do that. Look around the streets. Difference is: she didn't have to live on the streets.
Belinda is a trooper fighting the odds, pros and cons. You go girl,, see you at the Greek Theatre with the Go Go's!!!
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Good for you! Stay clean.
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Chris,she has been clean for 5 years.I also support spellcheck!!!
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I always thought she looked like a younger Ann-Margret....
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This is nonsense. She's only quitting because she began to realize that at the age of 51, her body might no longer be able to handle it. If she was doing it for 30 years (with a 9-month break for pregnancy) and managed to continue living the life she led, then she was no different from the person who has a scotch and soda every night, but decides to give it up later in life because of advanced age.
There were no nights in prison or sex for drugs stories here. She was a together person whose "release" of choice was cocaine.
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I believe that homosexuality is wrong, it is the way I was raised and it is my belief and I am allowed to have my beliefs. The one and only thing that would make me change my belief would be if one of my children told me they were gay. I will always support my children even if it meant I had to change my beliefs, and I feel sorry for your children.
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Hate much! Wow, It's hard to believe that there are people like you that hate for hate sake.
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If you haven't heard Belinda's French-language CD, Voila!, she is an absolute revelation! I absolutely love both the French-language and extra english-language CDs in the 2-CD set!
Je t'aime, ma belle!
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