In September, five teenage boys killed themselves after being physically or verbally (or both) assaulted for being gay. The suicides of Tyler Clementi, 18, Billy Lucas, 15, Asher Brown, 13, Justin Aaberg, 15, and Seth Walsh, 13, have brought national attention to the epidemic of bullying in American schools.
Now, a number of stars, many of whom have personal experience with anti-gay bullying, are speaking out in hopes of raising awareness and providing support to teens and young adults who are being victimized or who are having trouble dealing with their sexuality. The topic is also addressed in a cover story for this week's PEOPLE magazine and in a week-long series on CNN's Anderson Cooper 360.
Most recently, 'Project Runway' mentor Tim Gunn spoke candidly about his own suicide attempt and his support for The Trevor Project, a national 24-hour, toll-free confidential suicide hotline for gay and questioning youth. "I understand the desperation. I understand the despair," an emotional Gunn said with tears in his eyes. "And I understand how isolated you can feel ... It will get better. I promise."
Following Billy Lucas' death, well-known columnist and author Dan Savage launched the "It Gets Better" campaign – a series of user-created YouTube videos in which gay adults openly discuss the torment they incurred in high school and encourage GLBT youth to stick it out because "it gets better." Clementi's death has inspired an overwhelming response to the campaign, which has since been flooded with videos from men and women across the world sharing their stories.
"When a gay teenager commits suicide, it's because he can't picture a life for himself that's filled with joy and family and pleasure and is worth sticking around for," Savage told MTV a week after Clementi's death. "So I felt it was really important that, as gay adults, we show them that our lives are good and happy and healthy and that there's a life worth sticking around for after high school."
Savage's "It Gets Better" message has seemingly become the rallying cry around which a movement against anti-gay bullying has centered, with Anne Hathaway, Jenny McCarthy, Ian Somerhalder and Kristin Cavallari recording a PSA for The Trevor Project that uses the motto. 'Harry Potter' star Daniel Radcliffe also recently spoke to MTV about the importance of the Trevor Project.
TV stars Ellen DeGeneres and Neil Patrick Harris have also spoken out against anti-gay bullying. "This needs to be a wake up call to everyone ... One life lost in this senseless way is tragic; four lives lost is a crisis," DeGeneres said in an emotional message taped on the set of her daytime talk show. "My heart is breaking for their families, for their friends and for our society that continues to let this happen. These kids needed us, and we have an obligation to change this. We can't let intolerance and ignorance to take another kid's life."
Harris, who is openly gay and will welcome twins via surrogate with his partner of over six years, actor David Burtka, this fall, pleaded with gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youth to focus on their futures, which he sees as bright and full of possibility. "For the love of Pete, there's no need to harm yourself if something is going bad. You can act with strength, you can act with courage, you can act with class," Harris said in the MTV PSA. "Stand tall, be proud of who you are. This is a good time that we live in, and we're being granted more and more rights. And that's awesome, and it will continue in that direction. Yeah – be proud."
Clementi, a freshman at Rutgers University, jumped to his death from the George Washington Bridge after his roommate, Dharun Ravi, 18, allegedly used a web cam in their dorm room to secretly stream a romantic encounter between Clementi and another man. Ravi's alleged behavior inspired disgust from conservative commentator Bill O'Reilly, who, when responding to analyst Gretchen Carlson's assertion on FOX News' 'The O'Reilly Factor' that Ravi and his accomplice, Molly Wei, 18, "are probably good kids who did an immensely stupid thing," said, "I don't believe that. I don't think you can be a good kid and plan that kind of stuff out in the cruel nature that they did ... I think they're bad kids. They're bad kids, and they should have been raised better."
Comedienne Sarah Silverman has inspired some controversy by positing that a national atmosphere of institutionalized homophobia, as exemplified by the military's Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy as well as campaigns for constitutional amendments to ban civil marriage for same-sex couples, are at the heart of this epidemic.
(Warning: Explicit Language)
And former NSYNC singer Lance Bass, who came out as gay on the cover of PEOPLE in 2006, surprised many when he admitted to having been a bully himself. "If people can look at me and see that I was one of those bullies that always made fun of gay people, and I had this huge secret, so there's always a bigger story than what you see."
What has been made abundantly clear -- regardless of personal opinions on the religious and/or moral implications of homosexuality -- is that there is a problem, and no child (no person) deserves to be harassed or made to feel worthless because of who they are. If you or someone you know is suffering in silence, encourage them to get help by visiting The Trevor Project or calling 866-4-U-TREVOR.
Every parent of every child that is being bullied should bring a law suit against the one that is doing the bullying...then and only then will it stop. Once a law suit is mentioned then everyone takes notice.
It is known that bullies are bunch of people with a bad childhoods that were mistreated, and abused by their parents and family members and didn't care about them so they bully other people by picking on them and putting others down and beat others. Bullies feel satisfied and feel they are in control, because they feel that they do want ever they want to do with people.
Wednesday 06 October By Leah Vote downVote upReport this
"The LGBT suicide rate is 4 TIMES HIGHER than it is for straight teens. THAT is why it is getting so much attention. But yes, ALL bullying should be stopped."
Show us the numbers and stats. don't just say it, prove it.
How sad that any young person is so desperate they are driven to suicide. Just because people may not understand someone is no reason to bully them and pick on them. You are just as different from them as they are from you, and we are all in the human family. People need to help each other, not hurt each other. I wouldn't want it on my conscience that I had driven someone to suicide.
Not everyone can grow up tough. Not everyone can grow up as strong, lean, mean and green as others. Some people are just not naturally fighters. Some are just..Sensitive. Regardless of background, bullying is not a way to go. More power to the bullied and damnation to the bullies.
It's not about being gay. You can be bullied for being short, fat, Indian, red haired... the list goes on. Right or wrong, no one deserves to be bullied. But the really important point is that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
This is not about having your feelings hurt. This was a disgusting, horrible act that was beyond being mischievous. This guy Ravi is evil, his actions were evil, and I hope he lives forever in guilt knowing that he pushed this poor kid over the edge to his death. There is nothing easy about being born gay. It's a life of conflict and misunderstanding and often loneliness. It's time we learn that everyone needs love and understanding.
What they NEED to do, is to make ALL bullying illegal: in the workplace, in school, everywhere, against ANYONE! We have a society that focuses on bullying because of religion, race, sexual orientation. What about people who mob a person because simply they're different, or there's something about them they don't like? Where are laws protecting EVERYONE????????????
my child was bullied at school. The school did nothing so I took it up by myself. I got the NYPD involved and I went to court. The bully got 3 years probation.
Don't buy this homosexual propaganda. Sure they have feeling and should be treated like anyone else; but that is not to say that America needs to accept homosexuality. Do you want your kids shown homosexual activity in school and told that it's a matter of "choice"? Do you wan't him or her using the lavatory at such a school where there is sure to be older kids looking for fellatio etc? Don't buy it. It's not about people's feelings; it's about the moral structure of YOUR society.
It's so funny how people always bring up homosexual activity in school every time somebody says that it is time we accept gays, lesbiens, and bisexuals just because people accept gays, lesbiens, and bisexuals does not mean that this will happen. It is also funny how the people that are bashing the gays are gay them selfs it's time america wakes up and realize that if you are born in the usa no matter what you should be given equal rights
okay, mjk, tony AND you are idiots! (ok, i'm apologizing in advance because i don't like name-calling) ...but what the heck kind of school did you go to that "showed" sexual activity of any kind, gay or straight? or condoned fellatio in the lavatory? and the myth that gay teens will attack your child in the first place - let alone risk getting KILLED by the school tough guys - which is probably what would happen - that's just stupid... and, don't look now, but every boy over the age of 13 is looking for fellatio, and it's the straight ones who are far more likely to be aggressive about getting it (from girls,) and even encouraged to do so, because it means they're "real men"... teenage girls are forced and/or coerced into sexual activity by straight teenage boys all the time, coerced gay activity is just plain miniscule...
it's okay if you disapprove of gay sex per se, that's your prerogative (i'm not exactly hip-hip-hooray about it myself,) but it's not okay to remain ignorant of the facts and perpetuate the kind of misinformation that is getting these poor kids bullied in the first place...
I pray that these individuals who choose to pursue this life style will consider the consequences and dirtiness of this sin as well as the unimaginable guilt it must bring. I pray for the teens of America who are not choosing to be gay to not be so hard on those who do and to stop teasing them. People shouldn't be bullied for choices because we all make choices, both bad and good. It's no one's place to judge us but God all mighty.
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Yeah, and a special place with your name on it is waiting there for you.
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Every parent of every child that is being bullied should bring a law suit against the one that is doing the bullying...then and only then will it stop. Once a law suit is mentioned then everyone takes notice.
Reply
It is known that bullies are bunch of people with a bad childhoods that were mistreated, and abused by their parents and family members and didn't care about them so they bully other people by picking on them and putting others down and beat others. Bullies feel satisfied and feel they are in control, because they feel that they do want ever they want to do with people.
Reply
Wednesday 06 October
By Leah
Vote downVote upReport this
"The LGBT suicide rate is 4 TIMES HIGHER than it is for straight teens. THAT is why it is getting so much attention. But yes, ALL bullying should be stopped."
Show us the numbers and stats. don't just say it, prove it.
Reply
I wonder why the gay suicide rate is so high...gee...maybe because it is wrong, immoral, and perverted.
How sad that any young person is so desperate they are driven to suicide. Just because people may not understand someone is no reason to bully them and pick on them. You are just as different from them as they are from you, and we are all in the human family. People need to help each other, not hurt each other. I wouldn't want it on my conscience that I had driven someone to suicide.
Reply
Not everyone can grow up tough. Not everyone can grow up as strong, lean, mean and green as others. Some people are just not naturally fighters. Some are just..Sensitive. Regardless of background, bullying is not a way to go. More power to the bullied and damnation to the bullies.
Reply
It's not about being gay. You can be bullied for being short, fat, Indian, red haired... the list goes on. Right or wrong, no one deserves to be bullied.
But the really important point is that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
Reply
This is not about having your feelings hurt. This was a disgusting, horrible act that was beyond being mischievous. This guy Ravi is evil, his actions were evil, and I hope he lives forever in guilt knowing that he pushed this poor kid over the edge to his death. There is nothing easy about being born gay. It's a life of conflict and misunderstanding and often loneliness. It's time we learn that everyone needs love and understanding.
Reply
kids today are SICK...these bullies have very low self esteem and take it out on anyone they choose. Where are the parents? They are just as bad.
Reply
What they NEED to do, is to make ALL bullying illegal: in the workplace, in school, everywhere, against ANYONE!
We have a society that focuses on bullying because of religion, race, sexual orientation. What about people who mob a person because simply they're different, or there's something about them they don't like?
Where are laws protecting EVERYONE????????????
Reply
my child was bullied at school. The school did nothing so I took it up by myself. I got the NYPD involved and I went to court. The bully got 3 years probation.
Reply
Don't buy this homosexual propaganda. Sure they have feeling and should be treated like anyone else; but that is not to say that America needs to accept homosexuality. Do you want your kids shown homosexual activity in school and told that it's a matter of "choice"? Do you wan't him or her using the lavatory at such a school where there is sure to be older kids looking for fellatio etc?
Don't buy it. It's not about people's feelings; it's about the moral structure of YOUR society.
Reply
You are an idiot Tony Loscalzo!
Rebecca, Tony tells it like it is. Just b/c you apparently have no reasonable rebuttal doesn't mean you should resort to name calling.
That sadly seems to be the norm. "I don't like these anti-gay sentiments! You're all a bunch of idiots!"
It's so funny how people always bring up homosexual activity in school every time somebody says that it is time we accept gays, lesbiens, and bisexuals just because people accept gays, lesbiens, and bisexuals does not mean that this will happen. It is also funny how the people that are bashing the gays are gay them selfs it's time america wakes up and realize that if you are born in the usa no matter what you should be given equal rights
Well said, Tony.
okay, mjk, tony AND you are idiots! (ok, i'm apologizing in advance because i don't like name-calling) ...but what the heck kind of school did you go to that "showed" sexual activity of any kind, gay or straight? or condoned fellatio in the lavatory? and the myth that gay teens will attack your child in the first place - let alone risk getting KILLED by the school tough guys - which is probably what would happen - that's just stupid... and, don't look now, but every boy over the age of 13 is looking for fellatio, and it's the straight ones who are far more likely to be aggressive about getting it (from girls,) and even encouraged to do so, because it means they're "real men"... teenage girls are forced and/or coerced into sexual activity by straight teenage boys all the time, coerced gay activity is just plain miniscule...
it's okay if you disapprove of gay sex per se, that's your prerogative (i'm not exactly hip-hip-hooray about it myself,) but it's not okay to remain ignorant of the facts and perpetuate the kind of misinformation that is getting these poor kids bullied in the first place...
The gays are taking over. This stupid article proves it.
I pray that these individuals who choose to pursue this life style will consider the consequences and dirtiness of this sin as well as the unimaginable guilt it must bring. I pray for the teens of America who are not choosing to be gay to not be so hard on those who do and to stop teasing them. People shouldn't be bullied for choices because we all make choices, both bad and good. It's no one's place to judge us but God all mighty.
Reply