Pop-Ed: David and Courteney Will Put Coco First
By Vikki Ziegler Posted Oct 14th 2010 02:40PM
Pop-Ed: Much has been made of the details behind Courteney Cox and David Arquette's separation this week, especially after his rambling call to Tuesday's Howard Stern Show. But let's not forget to focus on the couple's 6-year-old daughter, Coco.
Arquette revealed that he broke the news to Coco gently: "We went to a beach and had a picnic," Arquette told Stern in the now-infamous interview. "[I] explained to her that we're grownups, and a lot of the time when grownups are growing up, they need to figure out their lives," adding that, "Sometimes that takes each other having a little space."
All too often, children of divorce are left feeling alone, insecure and vulnerable to self-esteem issues. It is paramount for Courteney and David to continue to be extremely sensitive to her every move during this rocky time.
It's difficult enough to be a child growing up in a fractured household. In my family law practice, I see young children day after day having problems in school, difficulty focusing and not adjusting well in tense situations. Children often have a problem assimilating with their peers and often rebel as they mature. When you add the media attention that a celebrity couple attracts, the children of Hollywood always become affected in some capacity. Negative talk surrounding a split will blanket magazine covers and TV shows and could be devastating.
It is imperative for Courteney and Dave to retain a therapist or mental health professional to help Coco cope with the breakup as well as develop their ability to properly co-parent. They must watch for any changes in their daughter's demeanor or any strange new habits. She will be crying out from the separation almost immediately and will need unconditional love and support from both parents. They must also be unified in their ability to talk to her about the divorce and make it a point to not disparage one another while alone with her. Nasty remarks can leave an indelible imprint on children and can backfire in the future relationship with parents.
Vikki Ziegler, named one of the Top 40 Lawyers Under 40 by the New Jersey Law Journal and NJ Biz, is a frequent contributor to FOX News Channel, CNN, HLN, CNBC, FOX Business Network, CBS and more. She has launched DivorceDating.com, which is a resource for bringing singles together by helping them get through difficult times and growing from their experiences. Her first book, 'The Pre-marital Survival Guide,' can be purchased on Amazon and www.vikkiziegler.com.
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