PopEater Imagines Taylor Swift's Inevitable Jake Gyllenhaal Breakup Tune

By Denise Warner Posted Jan 5th 2011 04:45PM

Taylor Swift is known for writing about her ex-boyfriends. She even freely admits it.

So we couldn't help but imagine what her musical ode to Jake Gyllenhaal would be. (You know, since he just broke up with her.)

For your enjoyment, PopEater's 'Left My Heart in a Coffee Cup.'

You were twenty-nine, I was twenty.
That didn't stop us from getting hot and heavy.
(Not too heavy since I'm not Miley, y'all)
Maybe that was the problem after all.

[Refrain]
You broke my heart and left it in a coffee cup.
Ohh yeah in a coffee cup.
I couldn't drink alcohol, so that was our only choice.
Now that you've dumped me, I found my voice.

The actress on 'Glee' introduced us in London.
And from the first moment, I was smitten.
We were so happy, what went wrong?
Was it my age? My looks? Anne's boobs? My song?

[Refrain]

Don't think you're special, you Brokeback man.
I write about all my exes, It's the only thing I can
Do to make my heart feel better, in this cruel world.
Hopefully Lautner's available, to resuscitate this girl.

[Refrain X 2]

Stay tuned for the upcoming music video, to premiere on PopEater this week.

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Tags: jake gyllenhaal, taylor swift

Comments

(10)

Thursday 06 January

By Mystere

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Poor Taylor, have some chocolate.:D

Wednesday 05 January

By OfAlaska

It's obvious everything they do was just too paparazzi covered. Everything that falls into her orbit is now swooped-on by the media and people trying to tear her down. Hey, look, her third album is still on top of both the country charts an the top pop 200, she's the youngest person every honored by the Songwriters Hall of Fame, the 19th highest-earning person in America and some people claim she can't sing. Listen to "Mean" on her new album and find if you don't want to sing along.

By Jim Lowe

If that rocket scientist wants to dump Taylor Swift I say GOOD! I'll take her, I'll take her!

By Joe

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yeah...i don`t think she is worried. just another romance in her young age. nothing different from what any other girl her age is doing. i do find these attempts to make some jokes about it lame.
cut his girl some slack. she has done nothing wrong.

By Synclaire

I think she falls hard and fast and doesn't take the time to let the relationship grow and maybe smothers the guys. It had alot to do with her age and maturity I'm sure.

By Jim

Shes only 21. Damn she needs to sew her oats. When she finds her man, she'll know. I hope she takes her sweet time. She has a lot of performances left in her yet. She's a good girl and I love her music. Long Live Taylor Swift!!!

By Colleen

When most people are told to "sow their wild oats" they're usually referring to sex. Taylor adamantly says she doesn't plan to do that until marriage. Jake Gyllenhaal is the guy who most likely doesn't follow that credo. And while he probably didn't force her into doing anything she didn't want to do, that stuff will strain a relationship.

By fairyduster72

Colleen, I agree with you totally she is a wonderful performer but her songs are pre-teenish and once she has a real relationship that involves sex and she gets her heartbroke then her songs will change....She is not the best role model due to the fact she feeds young girls to many unrealistic ideas about boyfriends and romance and life is hard for teens these days.

By Julie

How is she a great performer? She rarely sings during her performances, which is pathetic, considering she calls herself a singer. She also fakes playing guitar. She's a faker. As a musician, I'm sick and tired of these pop stars (let's face it, she's pop, not country) faking their way through stardom when there are so many truly talented artists who will never get the time of day.

Though I agree with you that her songs are unrealistic. How old is she? 21? I can't judge her harshly because she's young and playing the field. And why not? But you're right, in that once she really gets her heart broken, her songs will change, and her pre-teen demographic won't be able to relate.

By jerry

Good job, Jake! She is sooooo overrated! She looks like she's 12. He's better off to find a WOMAN!

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