Charlie Sheen's Fighting Words: His Most Outrageous Sound Bites

By Kiki Von Glinow Posted Mar 1st 2011 02:19PM

Grandmothers across the country rejoiced this past week as they were given a wealth of new Charlie Sheen quotes to embroider to their throw pillows. But they aren't the only ones "winning," as Sheen is laughing all the way to the self-created winners circle.

From calling "rock bottom" a "fishing term" to touting the greatest drug ever made ("I'm on a drug, it's called 'Charlie Sheen'") to making sure he sticks it to those who have wronged him, Sheen is whipping out the fighting words.

But what makes Sheen a winner? Check out the most outrageous sound bites form the 45-year-old star's tornado of recent talk show appearances and interviews with the likes of NBC, TMZ and ABC.

We give it a week before we see teenage Sheen wannabes walking around with T-shirts emblazoned with his face and the words, "My conduct is bitchin'."

Check out Charlie's most outrageous quotes after the jump!

Charlie the "Warlock"

►"I'm on a quest to claim absolute victory on every front."

►"I'm proud of what I created. Why wouldn't I be? I exposed people to magic. I exposed them to something that they otherwise would not see in their boring normal lives. And I gave that to them!"

►"Dying is for fools. Amateurs."

►"Resentments are the rocket fuel that lives in the tip of my saber."

See Charlie tell the 'Today' show about his "war" against CBS:

Charlie the "Winner"

►"[I was] bangin' 7-gram rocks and finishing them because that's how I roll. I have one speed, one gear ... go!"

►"I mean, what's not to love? Especially when you see how I party. Man, it was epic. The run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards all of 'em just look like droopy-eyed armless children."

►"What's the cure, medicine to make me like them? Not gonna happen. I'm bi-winning. I win here, I win there. Now what? If I'm bipolar, aren't there moments when a guy like crashes?"

►"You borrow my brain for five seconds and just be like 'Dude, can't handle it! Unplug this bastard!' ... It fires in a way that is perhaps not from this terrestrial realm."

►"I am on a drug, it's called 'Charlie Sheen.' It's not available 'cause if you try it once you will die. Your face will melt off, and children will weep over your exploded body."

See Sheen talk face-melting on ABC:

Charlie the "Poet"

►"I've got magic. I've got poetry at my fingertips."

►"I wanted to watch 'Jaws' on the ocean in the dark and be afraid."

►"It's been a tsunami. And I've been riding it on a mercury surfboard."

►"I'm still alive, which is pretty cool."

See PopEater editors sound off on Sheen's wild ways:

Tags: Charlie Sheen

Comments

(201)

Sunday 06 March

By mysty

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Will someone PLEASE give this potential psych patient some damned MEDS!!! NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jesus Mary and Joseph,shut his dam face up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday 05 March

By Merlyn

DNile is in Egypt. Loved your dad, Martin in "The Little Girl Who Lived Down the Lane", You on the other hand are a pompus, over-rated and over-paid, father of five, who should not be airing his dirty laundry to the world. I surmize that you are not ashamed of yourself, think about it others are embarrased for your children and their mothers. Don't you have any dignity?

By Larry Snider

When I listen to Charlie talk it is a lot like I'm listening to another "Charles"...aka Manson

By Mike

This scares me, because the same thing happened in a way with an actress before 9/11/01 happened.

By Kristen

I love how this is breaking news and yet the stuff happening in Libya or whats going on with our soldiers and things like that are hardly ever noticed. Let his family worry about him the whole world shouldn't have to put up with his crap too. we get it Charlie your a "Winner" good for you....now let me get on with my life w/o having to see your drug abused mug everywhere.

By Linda

Charlie Sheen please help, I want to know why on gods green earth the government dropped my 1 year old grand baby from Medicaid and she has a heart problem.............Charlie, please help or who ever can help our system is screwed up!!!!!!!

By tanbiker2

Let's hope he'll be dead soon. Not quite as soon Qaddafi, but a day or two later. The world will be a better place.

Monday 07 March

By What?!

Charlie is evil. He do not care for anyone but himself. Selfish man.

By Dana

You can all say what you want, and judging by what I've read, you will, but the man is ill, both physically and mentally. Look at him .. look at how much he's aged in the past year.

Secondly, if you've ever seen Sheen in an interview prior to all this craziness, you remember he wasn't always this manic, this dillusional, this weird. He's always been a bad boy, but he was cool about it.

He's acting exactly the way a family member of mine did last summer, shortly before being diagnosed as having bi-polar disorder brought on by excessive drinking. My family member even said the same thing, "I'm not bi-polar, if I were bi-polar I'd crash at some point, wouldn't I? Didn't happen to him for a while. He's now medicated and back to his normal self, thank God.

I pray Charlie gets the help he needs, not only for his health and career, but to help pull his family out of the hell I know they're going through, wondering if they're son, brother, uncle, dad will ever be the same again.

It's Gadhafi, you fool .. and what a rude thing to say about someone who is clearly going thru some mental health issues.

By bdyftns

a o l has censorship....even if the language is clean. Boooooooooooooooooooo.

By linda

Hey most men on this planet wish they were Charlie, hell I would if I was male.....I want the house and to just be frieds ...LOL pool and "hot tub alone"...been through the change and do not want sex. sorry Charlie...Charlie can you please help my grand baby girl....email me and will send a pic and her Dr's name, please help, this system is so F'ed up! Thank you Linda Hatfield

By Goyo

WHAT A MORON AND THOSE WHO WATCH HIM MAKE MONEY SO HEE CAN BREAK THE LAW BY USING CONTROLED SUBSTANCES .

Hey hey hey, whats goin on? I am trying to ask for help from Charlie to get the GOV to help my grand baby that has a heart condition and the GOV dropped her, she is 1years old and my love and life and no we cannot afford the open heart surgery!!! Tell me how to get her help?

By Maj Karma

Keep trying Aol, we like and trust Charlie Sheen a hell of alot more than we like and trust you, ABC, CBS and the rest of your Brainwash Kabal.

By kimd

Ugh.

By Susan

Let's hope God intervenes for the sake of the children.

Saturday 12 March

By Ron

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Charlie Sheen is the biggest ego minded fathead in Follywood. Thats what keeps most of them going their ego's are like heart-lung machines

By mary

The day when we stop exploiting the mentally ill will be a good day. Turn off the cameras and interviews. Would you stick a mike in the face of a cancer vic whose mind is addled by chemo? Seriously, rethink entertainment America and hope he gets the treatment he needs. One talented and intelligent man...give him and the mentally ill the dignity they deserve. Leave the man and his family alone for the sake of their wellness!!

By Badmotorfinger

I love that interview. Reminds me of Motley Crue and we all know Nikki Sixx owns!

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