Memo to 'Miserable' Justin Timberlake: Beg Britney Spears to Come Back

By Matthew Shepatin Posted Mar 18th 2011 02:00PM

Pop-Ed: We get it, Justin Timberlake. We know why you're miserable. One more night of couch-cuddling and Netflix-watching with Jessica Biel and you were going to go bananas. Caged birds must sing. Butterflies must be free. D***s must not be boxed (or so the song tells us).

But picking up random booty-shakers at the club and rocking their bodies till the break of dawn is going to lose its appeal over time. Then what? How long before you're spotted canoodling in public with another LA actress/hottie. You'll be walking her dog in the West Village. She'll be wearing a fun, furry hat (or maybe you will). She'll be cute-as-a-button, somebody like newly single Ashley Greene.

But you need to look a little closer at your past to figure this one out, JT.

Don't lie to us, man. We already heard rumors that you hooked up with Mila Kunis. Don't let us see photos of you bowling together in a hipster bar in Brooklyn, of her "falling over" while releasing the ball and you catching her as she laughs hysterically.

You're having fun now. But it's going to get boring.

The cure: a sexy-hot firecracker with a crazy streak a mile long. Somebody who could turn your world upside down, who could go all Penelope Cruz in 'Vicky Cristina Barcelona' on your ass.

Crazy, sexually volcanic hellcat, thy name is Britney.

Cancel the Netflix and call your ex, JT. She looks fantastic. She's got her life together. Great new album. No more mental head-shaving meltdowns. As for the fact she's seeing somebody ... come on, Jason Trawick? That's an Applebee's bartender name. There's only one JT for Britney, and it's you, hombre.

Sure, eventually she'll make your life tough. Worse than Jessica Biel could ever in a million years. That's because she's your soulmate, bub. Hate to break it to you. But I know it. Your fans know it. Even Joey Fatone knows it -- call him up, he'll tell you.

And down deep, I think you know it, too. I think both you and Britney know it. Don't fight destiny, JT. Do what you know you need to do. Hit that crazy one more time.

Whoever made this video has the right idea:

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Tags: Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake

Comments

(28)

Friday 18 March

By Barbara

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Dumb! She should not give him the time of day.
He did not stand by her and he will let her down again.

By Dew

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She cheated on him with Wade Robson.
Hence the breakup and snarky videos.

Saturday 19 March

By angela

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Dew
It was actually never confirmed past a few tabloid covers that Britney actually cheated, let alone with Robson.

By ro

She is too good for him!

Although it would be kinda sweet I'm thinkin' hmmm...

By chris

this is hilarious on point. :)

By Mary

This was funny, thanks!!!

By Mistercd

"Great New album'??? You wouldn't know a great album, if you fell over it.

By SaraS

YESSSSS!!! I totally agree. Justin could make Britney truly happy again, and they would be the pop king and queen again. (I know I sound like such a nerd; I am a successful 27-year-old with a life thankyouverymuch, but I can't help but want these two together.)

By Gatitta

LOL I just turned 28 and I feel the same way!!! Must be our age, but I'd love to see them back together again too.

Monday 25 July

By Winne

I agree with you too. I almost cry seeing them apart. Only Justin can make Britney truly happy and vice versa. I feel like they both are waiting for each other's return. I don't see Britney's authentic smile since their break up. Pleaseeeeeee, Justin, go back to her. She is waiting for you. Britney!!! Just call him or text him. Do something you two!

By Zero

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I think Jason Trawick would pick him up by his neck and break him in two but he is good at running away.

By alish

best post ive read in awhile, as i am a huge fan of both

By MrsKiwi

Love it! So right!!!! Go JT and Britney!!

By frank

what are you guys smoking?
WHY in the world would Justin want to go back to Britney? the only thing britney can aspire for is that ugly old looking dude she's with now, while Justin can have any girl he wants.
I'll never understand why people can't seem to move on from that relationship when they both (Justin and britney) clearly have.
Get a life people.

Monday 21 March

By steven

Frank, You say Justin can have any girl her wants...Let me guess, you wish you were that girl don't ya? What an IDIOT!

By charles

HEY JUSTIN Go get your "soul mate" . She is beautiful and so are you You guys fit and you always will. You are adults now and you will make it. cpg

By just saying

Justin, if you have half a brain,,,please get on your knees and beg for Britney to go back!

You two are joined at the hips. Talk to the lady and get to know her again slowly. I think you two are beautiful together. It ain't over yet. "It Ain't over yet" (The Notebook)

I am thinking the same movie. You are totally right. It ain't over yet.

By Becky

Hilarious! That's funny....

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