Keanu Reeves Pens Severely Depressing Book

By Kiki Von Glinow Posted Jun 17th 2011 05:00PM

It looks like Keanu Reeves has a sense of humor when it comes to his stereotyped sadness. According to The Guardian, the often glum actor has penned a book titled, 'Ode to Happiness.' But the actor's book is far from sunny.

"I draw a hot sorrow bath. In my despair room," reads one line.

Each page of the book features a line more somber than the last -- printed in large ink blot letters that look as though they've been smudged by falling tears. The book ends with a single black hole and the words, "It can always be worse."

Quick! Somebody offer this man a role in the next Reese Witherspoon romantic comedy -- that ought to cheer up this aching actor. But not so fast, ironically, the depressing literary work wasn't originally created with the intention to depress.

"I was in my kitchen hanging out with my friend Janey, and the radio was on," Reeves said in explaining the inception of his book. "And this station was playing, like, an orgy of depressing, self-pitying, nostalgic music ... It was so voluptuously horrible. And I just started to write on this piece of paper, because I had this image of, you know, that moment when you take a bath, you light that candle, and you're really just kind of depressed. And it was making Janey laugh so hard, I just kept going, piling on the self-pity."

So self-pity for the sake of laughter and happiness? Okay, we get it -- a satirical self-help book of sorts.

Once the book was complete, Reeves was planning on keeping it on his bookshelf as merely a reminder of the good laugh but friends began demanding copies and Reeves decided to spread the joy -- or deep rooted depression -- to anyone with just over $50 to spare. So what's next for the comic disguised as a manic depressive? Reeves hopes to publish an equally dark book of poems.

"I'm considering another idea I call 'Haikus of Hope,'" Reeves pontificated. "Basically like, 'I want to kill myself,' and go from there."

Sounds like he's really got something there.

Tags: keanu reeves

Comments

(26)

Friday 02 November

By Karen Stipan

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Where can I get a copy of the book Keanu recently wrote (Ode to Happiniess)? Hey, maybe I could play the role of his wife in this book, if it ever goes to the movies. Maybe it could be filmed in Seattle, Washington where the Sun Shines????

Friday 17 June

By stu

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Take ur meds Keanu. He & James Franco would make a hot couple.

By Blonde Ambition

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@Stu - so would you & your hand.

By shane

Hey Kiki -- he was joking, you idiot!

By Barbara

I think some people read only the headline and not the article, giving them the wrong impression....

I think sometimes people just read the headline and not the article, giving them the wrong impression.

Some people only read the headline and not the article, giving them the wrong impression.

By JBaer

How I long for the day when someone writes a severely joyful book...

There's already too many happy books out there. Look harder.

By MARTIN HUNTER

Maybe this is a cry for help from Keanu! Somebody should really look into this and help him.

I think so, too. All the "Cheer up dude!!" stuff in the world can't help someone in pain. Does anyone remember the deaths of his newborn baby & girlfriend? He'll probably be hurt from that for the rest of his life.

Saturday 18 June

By Misty

You could be right, he has been through a lot with the lose of his girlfriend and baby girl. Life is tough to handle sometimes, it's hard to take one day at a time but that's the way it has to be.

By karl jabour

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I dont want him to worry-I will pay for his funeral

By hello kitty

Life is like a helicopter ride, if you jump off, well, you know,...

By Thomas

he had a girlfriend?

Sunday 19 June

By charles

It says friend. not girlfriend.

Wednesday 22 June

By Katten

He had a girlfriend and they broke up several years ago. Their baby died, don't remember why...then about a year later the former girlfriend died--think it was a car crash, but I don't remember.

By kev

Keanu is a legend pretty much, as far as acting goes.

By jonzbeach

..uh...voluptuously horrible?? dude..so is your prose.

By Tammy

So much talent, so much to offer yet this should not be it...their is enough despair in the world, surely there is something brighter than this in life to write about. Please get out their and find it.....

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